Navigating Depression in Menopause—When You Feel Stuck and Can’t Move Forward

Welcome to part 2 of a three-part series examining often overlooked menopause symptoms. This entry is titled: Navigating Depression in Menopause—When You Feel Stuck and Can’t Move Forward

Disclaimer:  The information shared in this blog is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended as medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always consult with your healthcare provider before making any changes to your diet, exercise, or medical care, especially if you have an existing health condition. The views expressed here are my personal experiences and research, but individual health needs may vary.

To begin, I will share my personal experience in this area. There are days when I feel like I’m wading through thick mud, unable to get myself to move forward. Simple tasks—ones I know I should be doing, and that I need to do—sit undone. There are days I simply cannot make myself do anything. I find myself getting teary, and I cry at things that wouldn’t normally affect me so deeply. I feel overwhelmed, yet frozen, and unable to take action. It’s a strange combination of exhaustion, sadness, and frustration. It’s not just a bad mood; it’s a deep melancholy that lingers. I’ve wondered what’s wrong with me, and I’ve been so mad at myself for not being able to control these feelings. It has been, and can still be, a battle for me.

If you’ve found yourself in this place during menopause, know that you’re not alone. Depression during this time is real, and it’s more than just a reaction to aging or life circumstances. It’s biological, hormonal, and deeply personal all at once. And while I know movement and exercise helps, getting outside helps, and being around family helps—there are times that I just can’t seem to get past it.

Why Does Menopause Bring on Depression? 

For many women, menopause isn’t just about the normal side effects you always hear about- hot flashes and night sweats. The drop in estrogen and progesterone affects neurotransmitters like serotonin and dopamine—the very chemicals that regulate mood, motivation, and energy. This hormonal shift can bring on depression, anxiety, and a sense of being stuck.

Then add to that the psychological weight of this life stage: kids growing up, relationships changing, careers shifting, and for many of us, a growing sense of isolation. It’s no wonder that depression can creep in, even for women who have never struggled with it before.

I mentioned earlier how I have felt almost frozen, and physically unable to complete easy tasks. I didn’t realize there was a name for this, but then I learned about “functional freeze”.

One of the hardest things about menopausal depression is this feeling of being frozen in place. It’s not just sadness—it’s a lack of motivation, a sense of being overwhelmed, a functional freeze. You know what needs to get done, but the energy just isn’t there.

For me, it has been frustrating, because I have so much I want to do—so many dreams, projects, and plans—but sometimes, just getting through the day feels like an accomplishment. If you feel this too, I want you to know: it’s not laziness, and it’s not a personal failure. It’s your brain and body trying to adjust to a massive transition.

While I can’t say I’ve figured it all out, here are some things that have helped me get through the worst days:

 1. Getting Outside—Even When I Don’t Want To 

There’s something about fresh air and nature that shifts my energy, even if only a little. I never regret stepping outside, even when I have to force myself. The hardest part is getting out the door.

 2. Being Around People Who Make Me Feel Safe 

Isolation makes everything worse. Even though my instinct is to withdraw, and that feeling compounded through the pandemic, I do feel better when I’m with people who love me. Family, close friends, even just a quick chat with someone who understands—it reminds me that I’m not alone.

 3. Gentle Movement (Without Pressure to “Push Through”) 

I know that movement is good for me, but there are days when I can’t bring myself to do a full workout. Plus, I’ve also had to adjust my activities due to my broken leg. On those days, I focus on something gentle—a slow walk, stretching, chair yoga, or just deep breathing. Any movement is a step forward.

 4. Letting Myself Cry Without Judgment 

I cry so easily these days, and I’ve started to accept that maybe my body just needs to release emotions in this way. Instead of feeling weak for crying, I remind myself that tears are healing. I’m navigating a life-changing transition, and I’m learning to live in an empty nest, and that in itself is an emotional adjustment.

 5. Lowering My Expectations for “Productivity” 

This one is hard for me. I’ve sometimes measured my worth by what I get done. But right now, my body and mind are telling me that I need to slow down. Some days just doing one thing—even if it’s as small as responding to an email or making a meal—is enough.

 6. Finding Something That Brings a Spark of Joy 

When I feel low, I try to find something that lifts me—even if just for a moment. Sitting on our patio and listening to the birds, making a cup of coffee or tea, listening to music. These may all sound like little things, and they don’t heal depression and sadness, but they do remind me that I need to appreciate the simple things in life, and that joy exists.

If You’re Struggling, You’re Not Alone 

Menopausal depression is real, and it’s not just in your head. If you’re feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or like you can’t get past it, please be gentle with yourself. This phase of life is hard, but you’re not broken. You’re just moving through a massive transition, and it’s okay to struggle.

And if it ever feels too heavy—if the sadness won’t lift, if you’re losing hope—please reach out for help. A doctor, a therapist, a trusted friend. You don’t have to go through this alone.

Because so many women experience depression and emotional struggles in menopause, I’m dedicating a section of my upcoming Holistic Menopause Course to mental health and emotional wellbeing. We’ll talk about the science behind why this happens, real strategies to manage it, and how to find support when you need it most. If this is something you’re struggling with, I want to help you move forward with tools that actually work.

For now, I’m reminding myself (and you) that even on the hardest days, we can take small steps forward. Even if it’s just stepping outside for a breath of fresh air.

I see you. I understand. And we’re going to get through this together.